I’m sure many of you knew this one was coming… a blog post about my recent knee injury. As you can probably imagine, the situation was all-consuming and presented me with lots of time for reflection.

As a kid, I always thought that being strong, brave, and courageous meant doing hard, scary, or risky things. I sought out and admired people who were willing to put it on the line, push the envelope, and take risks. My heroes were big mountain skiers, MotoGP racers, base jumpers, and alpinists - people who were able to do, physically, what I’d only dreamed of doing.

Don’t get me wrong, that hasn’t changed… but as I got older, my list of heroes grew. I started admiring those who overcame mental obstacles as well - entrepreneurs, visionary leaders, and people willing to follow their dreams or their callings; especially when their dreams challenged traditional norms or expectations.

And still, my list and definition continue to evolve.

In a recent workshop, we asked participants to share stories of their bravery with one another. Most people described a scenario where they overcame adversity, did the hard thing, took the leap, and showed courage when they were scared.

And then one participant shared his story of bravery… a time he asked for help.

I watched as the twist in his story resonated with the room. It was a collective and simultaneous unlocking of a new “level.” Strength, derived not from masking one’s fears or weaknesses, but by admitting to them and asking for help. Strength, portrayed by exhibiting the confidence to lean into our imperfections.

Carl Jung refers to this as the “Paradox of Surrender” - the idea that releasing control is often when a person starts to regain their strength and power.

I’m about two months into recovery from my knee surgery. And while I’m typically a can-do sort of guy, who likes to project positivity and courage, it’s when I accepted my limitations, released control, and asked for help that I found new strength.

What did I find?

Admitting to one’s limitations without judgement can be freeing.
People show up in big ways to bolster and support*.
Relationships deepen and communities come together.

When I think of the strength I have within, I know I am limited. When I think of strength through support and community, I realize it is endless.

So my list of heroes now includes leaders that lead with vulnerability and create a sense of Psychological Safety amongst their teams. They enable teammates to be brave, ask for help and admit mistakes, and then come together in support of one another in pursuit of their mission.

As leaders, we don’t have to solve it all. We have to be willing to recognize when we need help and be strong enough to ask for it. In those moments of vulnerability, asking for and accepting support enables us to tap into the strength, courage, and wisdom we had access to all along.

*special shout out to my amazing wife and family for the late night ice runs!

More Perspectives: